20 year old Canadian girl finally learning to just enjoy life.

 

harryedward:

boy: *is nice to me*

me: wtf *looks down to make sure my titty aint out or something*

mustbekarma:

So far adulthood is just going grocery shopping, realizing you didn’t plan well or logically, going grocery shopping again, repeat ad infinitum. 0/10 stars, would not recommend

thewordsofclayton:

sirtarantino:

a guy walked into the board room and said

"hi sweetheart if you could fix me up a coffee real quick im meeting with the regional reports manager in like five minutes, thanks darling"

and i just stared at him and coldly said

"i am the regional reports manager"

we are now twenty minutes into this board meeting and i dont think i’ve ever seen a man look so embarrassed and afraid in my whole life

Good

(Source: sofiajonze)

monobeartheater:

djsais:

arceeofficial:

june-and-the-ocean:

egberts:

if you try to tell me cold doesnt have a smell you’re wrong

when its really cold you can literally smell how cold it is

SWEET JESUS

SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS

OH MY GOD.

I TELL PEOPLE THAT IT SMELLS “SHARP” WHEN IT’S COLD AND PEOPLE THINK I’M FUCKING INSANE.

DEAR CHRIST

COLD SMELLS THE SAME WAY SOME METALS SMELL

Rain smells round, cold smells sharp, and spring in general smells curly.

and heat smells fat and heavy

whattheeq:

My sister literally thought this was a llama. Nope it’s baby Gracie

whattheeq:

My sister literally thought this was a llama. Nope it’s baby Gracie

If you are not ready for her to call you at 3 AM freaking out, if you cannot handle her at her worst, if you only crave for her curves and not her mind, if you cannot deal with her mood swings and if you want her just for sex stay the fuck away.

Unknown (via jasfuckinq)

(Source: memoriesrecollected)

lastseasonsloser:

misha-let-me-touch-your-assbutt:

mishasminions:

IT’S BECAUSE THEY’RE FRED & DAPHNE

FUCK YOU AND YOUR BITTER JEALOUS LONELINESS HOWARD STERN

YES SO GOOD!!!!!

(Source: s-gellar)